Teaching Music Students to Practice: Some Myths and Some Tips
I have to begin this post with a confession.
I have four children. When my eldest was 6-years-old I found an excellent piano teacher in my local area and enrolled him for lessons. My second child enrolled shortly after and before long all four of my children were taking weekly piano lessons, and I - their piano teacher mum - was going to support them in their daily practice.
hmmm…
Not so much it turned out.
My children were terrible practicers. We couldn’t find a regular schedule that worked. We argued about it every day. I felt over-scheduled with dance and tennis and swimming, and I was exhausted. They had shocking technique and couldn’t read music. In short - I was my own worst nightmare. It took 3 years (THREE YEARS!!!) until we cracked it and fell into a decent practice routine. As a younger teacher, I would have fired us as students long before we made any success of music lessons. But the thing that actually happened was that I learned an important lesson…
Parents are People too
Before I had children (4 children in the space of five years to be precise) I was really clueless. When parents brought their children to lessons harried and late - books forgotten or lost - telling me stories about practice that didn’t happen, or in some cases tall tales about practice that they claimed happened but didn’t - I became frustrated and cross. I would think “Just do the work! - make your children DO THE WORK”. It never occurred to me that parenting life is bigger and more complex than I could have possibly imagined.
Then I had my own children and suddenly I was worrying about everything: their health and emotional wellness, my own health and wellness, money, work, exhaustion, schools, friendships, screen time, reading, homework, exercise, family time….. Well, I began to understand how unfair I had been before. I began to realise the power of compassion. Most importantly, I began to see how wonderful music is, as a language, as a force of healing, as a source of comfort.
Sometimes the families that need music the most are the ones that seem to be falling apart at the seams and never ever practice…
Without fail, I have never seen a student that is too busy for music practice. I have seen parents who believe that they themselves are too busy and this shadows everything in their homes and lives.
Some piano students do a million activities outside piano and still find time to practice an hour or more a day. On the other hand, there are families who have relatively quiet lives yet they are constantly stressed, always expressing how busy they are, never practicing. It’s a matter of perspective - when parents feel too busy, their children also feel too busy. I know this - I was that parent.
A New Mindset for Music Lessons
Each student’s musical journey belongs to them. I decided to start meeting students exactly where they are. When they walk into lessons I don’t say “What did you accomplish this week?”, My very first question is always “What’s new in life - What did you get up to this week?” because when they answer that question I begin to know where they might be, I begin to understand what emotions and experiences they brought with them. I can help them from that exact point.
Music lessons aren’t really about learning to play an instrument - not really. Music teaches us many things; work ethic, patience, discipline, logic, expression, honesty, beauty - We learn to play an instrument as a medium for all of this, but it is not the most important part of the process. It’s almost a byproduct of the experience.
Most children will not be concert musicians. The music and arts industry doesn’t even support this type of occupation these days. But children who study music will take the things they have learned and apply it to every aspect of their lives. Who says we don’t need leaders, parents, business owners, scientists and doctors who are patient, logical, disciplined, honest, with appreciation for beauty and expression? Surely, we need these types of people more than ever?
So Maybe Students Don’t Need to Practice?
No, of course this is not what I’m saying.
The study and the work is the only way we cultivate all these things. Teaching the instrument should be thorough and fastidious. We should teach at the highest possible level - insist on providing the best musical education that we can.
However, when we shift our mindset all of this becomes easier for our students and their families. The process becomes holistic and wholesome. Most wonderfully, it gives students the space to flourish and fall in love with music.
The Well Rounded Musician
I balk at the idea that children have too many activities. We need human beings that have many points of reference. We need artists and musicians that have experiences completely outside of music. We want children to have lives that are rich and full, and we want them to bring all of it to music; we want them to bring their fun, their pain, the silly sleepovers, the pyjama days in front of the tv, the dance /swimming / football / scouts/ homework… we want all of it and we want them to express it in music.
Because this is the language of music - life and all of its parts.
But How Do We Teach Them To Practice?
I have a cousin with older children who always says “just keep talking to your children. Never stop talking, never stop trying to connect.” I live by this advice and see how especially true it is as I watch my children in their teen years.
The same truth holds for music students and their families. We talk about practicing all the time. I try to connect with them about practice in every lesson and engage the whole family as much as possible in this process. I tell parents that learning an instrument is a whole family affair. This is especially true with the piano, an instrument that usually lives in the family sitting room. Every member of the household has to accept the lifestyle of the music students.
This takes adjustment sometimes and so we talk about it. I try to help and advise as much as possible. I want families to know that I am on their side. I understand how big this can feel and we work together to create the best ways to make practice an easy part of life.
Keep it Practical, Keep Students Engaged:
I’m not just a theorist - I also create reasons why music practice should stay at the top of everyone’s minds:
I organise events with the whole school; performances, master classes and practice challenges
I check in with their music diary every week and encourage them to record their practice time
I encourage them to have focused practice and not just mindless minutes waiting for a timer to go off
I host Watching Weeks, where families who aren’t able to sit in regularly for lessons can come and participate and watch a lesson happen
I spend time in lessons actually practicing if needed. I want students to feel like they progress every week, I want them to recognise the feeling of accomplishment, which means that sometimes, we just do the work together.
Being A Private Music Teacher is Big Job…
but it’s also a privilege. How lucky I am to have a life where I share music with other human beings every single day. How lucky I am to watch music heal and challenge.
I am blessed.
These days
My own children and I have finally learned how to fit practice into our life, they practice a lot actually. They also perform, study more than one instrument, travel with the school choir, have playdates and sleepovers, spend too much time eating rubbish and playing on screens. We have a full life and when I see them growing into full musicians my heart aches with happiness.
Because this is what it’s all about. This is the magic of music.